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all that forms you…a response to “remember this”

April 26, 2015 , , , , ,


I read this poem and I loved it and hated it completely, all at once.

I loved the sentiment + hope; yet I disagreed with the wording of the message.

It made me think, with purpose, quiet and clarity, of all that I am and all that I aspire to be.

And I reasoned that, if it made me stop and think this much…well then, it was a good read for me.

Here is what I love…

Right here, right now

You are alive

You survived

In this very moment, this one here

You can choose…to live…run, fly…wildly!

I believe each person really IS all that they are at that exact moment in time; their magic moments, their moments of introspection, their failures, their losses, their loving, their “crazy”, their “shy”, their essence, their actions, their words…right up until the “now” they are standing in.

It’s such a terrifying and magnificent thought…that you can be SO MUCH, contained in the envelope of your being…but also…SO AWESOME, in the true sense of the word.

But that’s what makes us so beautifully human…there’s no “perfect”, just beautiful and poignant imperfection, our measure of true living and authenticity. That we each of us are doing the very best we can at that exact moment in time and that we have a chance to change to momentum of that moment. Or go back and repair it. Or be elevated from the joy, lifted up with such exuberance over that moment of being…ache with grief…be torn and raw from sharp-edged tears.

We sit in the very cocoon of the present moment and do what we are able.

Sometimes we get it right, sometimes we get it wrong…but we are living…COMPLETELY, UTTERLY + WHOLE-HEARTEDLY.

I don’t think you can EVER forget any part of you…every ugly, cringe-worthy, agonising past action you have been is just woven into the fabric of your being. It’s embedded into you; a strong thread of new understanding, if you have allowed Time and Grace to do their work. You can reflect…you can wonder…you may have done all that you can…or not…but ultimately, every experience you have walked through against the measure of every day you’ve been alive forms you.

No matter how tempting, I don’t think it’s possible to forget any part of who I am…and nor I don’t want to. Those moments of struggle have not been pretty or comfortable, but they have shaped me into my present person. They are the reason my spirit resonates with the exact light that it does; they are the reason my heart beats with its present rhythm…the reason I think my thoughts…they have woven together every fibre of my being.

Without the struggle, the ache, the grief, the tears, the pain, the sadness…I would not know the compassion, authenticity and joy I know now. I would not have my sense of purpose, my love for life, or my clarity for living. I would not have my understanding or viewpoint.


I would not be me.


So…with great gentleness, I want to say…


I absolutely do not want to forget…


I absolutely do not want to unlearn a single moment of my life…


I want to hold them in the palm of my hand, nestled, as I would all the exceptional moments.


And while I won’t look at them too often, they are all of me.

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