the kwokkie diaries: day 25

July 20, 2018 — Australian, Canada, connection, courage, experience, exploring, home, humanity, love, self, travel, understanding, USA

Day 25: Vancouver, with San Francisco reflections.

And it feels like I have E X H A L E D.

I have loved every moment of this trip, and been inspired and had my senses heightened by all that I’ve felt, seen, experienced, smelled, lived.

But I have to confess, coming from the grittiness + contrast of San Francisco, from the wide expanse of sea along The Embarcadero, the buzz and rush of the city, and the stark reminders of human suffering and homelessness, I found myself on edge a little more. Just a little more alert.

My compassion rises up and I know that I must do the best I can to meet in the middle. Sometimes, I go quietly about my explorations, I do not stare or judge; other days I found the courage to buy a small contribution of food for someone in need. The most courageous? Looking these people of hardship in the eye and truly SEEING them. If I had fallen upon hard times, would someone have the courage to do this for me?

I am lucky beyond belief. Again, the tears well up fast and unbidden.

When I landed in Vancouver yesterday, it was like coming home. Half-way home, literally, and figuratively. I felt the weight lift off my shoulders, and the edge come away from me. I realised how much of a forward-motion, street-wise stare I had accumulated whilst exploring some parts of San Francisco and Washington.

With no disrespect to any of the places I have explored, I feel more at ease.

I breathe.

And I’m ready to go home.